Where’s The Beef?

Written by Lindsay Scouras
It’s right here!

so zen

For those of you who don’t know, my husband is a cook. Although he works full time in the kitchen at his family’s restaurant (and has since age 13), he somehow still manages to come home and make really amazing food for me. So I decided to start a category on here called “Sh*t My Husband Cooks,” not because it’s tastes like you know what, but because I’m bitter I didn’t come up with all that “Sh*t _____ Says” stuff. I’m not implying that any of it tastes bad, it’s amazing and that’s why I need to share it with you.

I also have to point out that I am what you would call a picky eater. I mean it. I didn’t even try a bagel until I was 16 years old. I’ve been making a more conscious effort in the past few years to be more adventurous with my palate, which I think is largely in part because of my husband. In case you’re wondering how picky we’re talking, here’s a list of foods I do not care for:

Eggs (in any form)
Yogurt
Rice
Any kind of berries
Honey Mustard
Oatmeal
Coffee
Chicken Pot Pie
Baked Potatoes
All vegetables except for corn, green beans, and mushrooms (cooked only)
Potato Salad
Seafood Salad
Coleslaw
Okay, honestly, anything with mayonaise
All Thanksgiving foods (turkey, gravy, cranberry sauce and pie. I’m serious)
Tuna
Chowder
Casserole
Beer
Zucchini
Ranch Salad Dressing
Meatloaf
Muffins
Beans
Nuts

So you can imagine that when Steve and I met almost seven years ago, he was quite embarrassed to take me to restaurants. I recall ordering toasted raviolis on our first date. On our “real” first date, I ordered something fancier and proceeded to push around an unfamiliar orange side on my plate.

Me (in disgust/horror/fear): What is this orange stuff on my plate?
Steve (in disbelief): Orange stuff? You mean squash?! That’s squash.
Me: Ew.
Steve: You don’t know what squash looks like?!
Me: *silence*

And for some reason, he still paid for my dinner. And made me dinners. And also breakfast. And my lunch. YES, HE PACKS MY LUNCH BAG EVERYDAY. I am lucky. I understand.

So it’s only recently that I have started to let additional foods into my diet that I was afraid of before. Also, Steve has adopted a system that I imagine is what parents do with their children in that he makes food, and I have to eat it or else I don’t eat. I have learned that I actually like fish that doesn’t come in stick form and that real macaroni and cheese is really is good (although I will always love Kraft spirals, now and forever).

So tonight I was delighted to return home after working all day to the smell of Asian Ginger Beef slow cooking in our Crockpot. I know that there are people that are obsessed with Crockpots, and judging from the amount of effort required to make a meal with one, I’m guessing they were invented for people like me. However, I still have yet to do anything more with it than eat what comes out of it. Actually, I’ve had an adverse affect as I actually broke the lid on ours and now it only cooks if Steve shoves tiny bits of rolled up paper towel in the holes where the screws used to be. Lindsay: – 20 points.

Paper towel or not, this Asian Ginger Beef is awesome. As someone who never liked beef stew (shocking, I know) this is kind of meaty and stewy but I like it because he puts it over angel hair pasta. *Correction: My husband, who never reads my blogs even if they are about him, informed me when I woke up this morning that there were many inaccuracies in this post. One of which is that this dish is served over some fancy noodles called Udon. Apparently, all noodles are just regular pasta to me.* There’s even an ingredient in there that I had never heard of but TRIED ANYWAY- bok choy! I still don’t entirely understand what that is, but I would describe it as a tastier version of cooked lettuce (because let’s face it, that sounds TERRIBLE).

It’s so good that I had a slight incident the last time Steve made it. The whole point of making things in Crockpots is that you let them cook all day and you leave and go about your business and then you come home and it’s like oh by the way, I’ve been doing crap all day but I’ve also prepared you this lovely meal. That’s exactly what he did but I got home first. Since Steve wasn’t due home for an hour, I was dying of hunger and didn’t want to start snacking (I have a slight problem with snacking. The peanut butter cookie story will have to wait for another day).

So I decided to try some of the beef out of the Crockpot. I grabbed a fork and sampled a piece. It was cooked to perfection, and slivers of meat literally fell apart in my mouth. I put my fork in the sink and returned to the couch. But the Crockpot just sat there on the counter, making sizzling noises as if is was talking to me. To a normal person, it probably just sounded like “pssssssssssssssssssssssssssh,” but to the hungry hungry horrors happening inside me is was like “sizzle sizzle I’M DELICIOUS EAT MORE.” I felt like one of those people in the desert that see a mirage when they’re dying of thirst. Eventually, it was just me, standing over the Crockpot, with a fork in one hand and a paper towel in the other (you know, for drippage), singlehandedly consuming our dinner.

It was standing in this precise position that Steve walked in and caught me. In the moment, it seemed as if they only thing I could do was stand still and pretend that he hadn’t seen me. Unfortunately, he did, and from hereafter every time he prepares his Asian Ginger Beef, I get a very stern message warning me to NOT EAT ALL THE MEAT.

My favorite thing about this meal is that it still tastes amazing days later (if there’s any left). I am terrible at consuming leftovers unless they came from a restaurant because I think things just don’t taste good after they’ve been heated up. And unlike my husband, I don’t eat leftovers cold.

So this is now one of our favorite meals. And according to the Crockpot Cookbook, it’s super easy to make. So eventually, maybe I’ll be a nice wife and learn how to make it too.

~L

2 comments on “Where’s The Beef?

  1. Good morning! It was so great to hang out with you this weekend – I hope you had a great dinner on Saturday night!

    I also totally feel your husband’s pain – Josh is a picky eater too! But at the end of the day, I love getting creative in the kitchen and Josh loves everything I cook so I feel incredibly lucky for that!

  2. What – what – you don’t like the chicken pot pie?! OMG, girl, you are missing out! ;o)

    My BF has a … limited … list of items he will eat. Pretty much if you were to feed him cheeseburgers and some form of potato each day, he’d be a happy man.

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